Daisy Jones?!

I am currently enrolled in my first semester of community college, where I am taking English Composition, Online Learning Tech, Algebra, and Intro to Microcomputers. I also have been working at the same place for 2 years. 


Why did I group those random facts? Well. I will tell you... 


Sunday evening I found myself feeling the wrath of my procrastination. I was crunching probably 4 hours of homework and quizzes into 2 hours. Not a problem, as I am a whiz. Or so I thought...


One of the homework assignments was to post the results of 5 Microsoft Office searches on the online class discussion board, then elaborate how we could use the results in our everyday lives. If you are not familiar with Microsoft Office; its basically an online service that has templates, clip art, all sorts of interesting lil things. The assignment was truly very simple. I just had to search "5 things that interest me". How could I go wrong doing THAT? Below is my exact entry to the discussion board. Pay close attention to numbers 1 & 3...

I, personally, was more interested in the templates than the clip art. I found these searches to be fruitful...

1. "Inspirational Quotes"- This search produced a handful of templates, and 4 motivational "cards" that I plan on printing and hanging in my cubicle. I can always use motivation to exist in the place that inspired me to attend college, to land a better job.

2. "Chore Chart" - This search produced many templates. However the one I downloaded immediately was titled "Family & Kids Weekly Home Chore and Commission Charting list". I believe this one will motivate my sons to prevent me from tripping over football equipment and using the last clean towel. Money is such a great motivation.

3. "Resume" - This search produced many templates for eye-catching resumes. See #1 for urgency.

4. "Recipe cards" - This search produced the cutest templates for recipe cards! Each had it's own design or holiday theme. I can always use a better way to organize recipes given to me by family or stumbled upon on the internet.

5. "Emergency Contact" - This search produced many templates for Emergency Contact Lists, which I can utilize for my sons when they go to a friend's house or are home with a sitter.

Aside from feeling very domesticated, I was pleased with my findings and my post. 

Now, in order to receive full credit for discussion board assignments, you must reply to at least one co-student's initial post. Great. I have no problem agreeing to disagree, relating, or just generally talking to people. So, I proceed to the main screen and start browsing through names. 

"John Davis"
"Randy Moore"
"Mandy Long"
"Miles Nordstrom"
"Daisy Jones"
"Emily Thompson"
"Alexa..." WHAT?! DAISY JONES?! No way! This can NOT be! Jones is a common name. Maybe it's someone ELSE! 


I click on the post submitted by "Daisy Jones", and as I read the excessively excited verbiage, I realize it is none other than "Daisy Jones", my immediate supervisor at work. Suddenly I suffered from temporary illiteracy and all i could say was "F*CK"; as I frantically return to MY post to find the delete button. I remember my English teacher had stated that discussion board posts could be deleted as long as no one had commented. No comments, I was safe! 


Low and behold... NOTHING in my life is ever as simple as clicking a delete button!!! After searching every pixel on the 15" monitor of my laptop, it became apparent that each class has unique rules. Mr. Intro to Microcomputers does not have the same flexibility as Mrs. English Composition.


At that point all I could do was laugh. And of course, swear. Then, pop a couple Benadryl... and go to bed. I had to be at work the next morning... I think.

Wash Your Hands!

Yesterday my oldest son was sent home from school early, with a headache, stomachache, and fever. I just dont get it. All three grueling months of summer, Corey did not have any stomach episodes. Three weeks into school, BAM! I dont know if its the communal watering fountains, satellite lunches, or the 300+ other cootie baring critters. That boy has a rough time fighting off stomach bugs from August to May.

Anyways, due to the fact that he spent the evening in the bathroom, and soiled every pair of mens-size-small boxer briefs in the house; I decided to let him stay home from school today. Upon leaving, I gave him a list of things to do around the house. Nothing huge, because he was "sick". "Tidy up, and do not make any messes that are greater than the existing ones... and dont use all of the toilet paper." We run out of toilet paper so fast in our family. Which is odd, because I am the only girl!

Around 10am, I called Corey from work. "Take the mac & cheese out of the freezer and put it in the fridge, so it doesnt take so long to cook tonight." He abruptly replies "OK BYE!". "Wait a minute! Why are you in such a hurry to get off the phone?! What are you up to?!" ..... N-O-T-H-I-N-G in my 11 and a half years of single-motherhood could have prepared me for what was about to be said.......... "You wanna know what I am doing? Ok! I am masturbating!"

I let out a slight "gasp" as 9,385 thoughts instantly raced through my head. The only thought that could make it's way out of my mouth, is the one ANY good mother would say: "Wash your hands!" Then, I dropped the phone receiver on it's base and held my head in my hands at my desk. Thought 9,386 was "WHY did I have to ask?!" Followed by 9,387 "WHY did he feel the need to tell ME?!"

 Today was a monumental day in parenting for me... Starting with the painful recognition that my oldest son is becoming a man. That he feels he can be brutally honest with me. And, that I am going to have to replace my pricey Victoria Secret lotions, with Suave and WalMart brands.

I hate this day.

Christopherism

As many of you know, I have four amazing sons. Corey is 11, Caden will be 10 on Halloween, Cyle will be 9 five days before Caden turns 10, and Christopher is 6. These 4 boys are the reason I breathe.

Sometimes Corey, Caden, Cyle and Chris are also the reason my breath is taken away. Whether it be moments of joy, sadness, amazement, fear, or in the case of this entry - laughter.

The boys and I had a pretty decent Labor Day weekend. Cyle had a football game on Saturday. Then, they had an evening of non-custodial visitation, while I went to a lil shindig on a lake, with a very good friend. Sunday, was of course dedicated to going to church and eating mass amounts, as a family. Monday, we lazed around a lil while, then went out to their half-sister's house, to hang out. Allow me to clarify... The boys have a 15 year old half-sister. Her mother and I have developed a kinship over the years. So, we hang out from time to time. Perhaps I will get more detailed on that lil saga in another blog...

So, we are all gathered in their living room watching tv, as their half-sister is working on a project for school. She politely asks Chris "can you go upstairs in my room and get me the glitter that is in the drawer, under my lamp." He agrees, and stomps along, up the stairs.

After ten minutes pass by, something in the corner of my eye catches my attention. Finally, Chris has found the glitter... Or did he?

As Chris makes it to the mid-staircase landing, he is now in full view. And, THIS is what he is attempting to lug down the stairs.










..........

NOT glitter, obviously.

Apparently all he heard was LAMP. Because every high school student needs a lamp for their projects.

Bless his heart.